


In A Heartbeat

by dididinosaur



Category: VIXX
Genre: Amnesia, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Betrayal, Drama, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, M/M, One Shot Collection, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-17
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-03-20 05:15:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 13,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13710618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dididinosaur/pseuds/dididinosaur
Summary: "You'll forget me in a hearbeat, but it will take time for me to forget you."





	1. Chapter 1

He watched them playing soccer. It was a cloudy afternoon that they have decided to stroll around and end up playing soccer in the field. He sighs, how he wished that he was not the only one who remembers. Well, basically the others do remembers but it's just that he needs Hyuk to remember as well.

"Don't be a party pooper Hyung! Come and join us! I can't even win against Taekwoon Hyung!!" Said Hyuk, pulling Hongbin away from the bench.

He let Hyuk drag him at the center!

"Oh no! The two maknaes are gonna team up!" Said Hakyeon dramatically.

"Hahahah! You'll gonna lose hyung!!" Hyuk said, his eyes disappearing.

"Like Taekwoon Hyung let you gonna lose. Such a spoiled evil maknae." Retorted Ken.

"Shut up Ken, I'm not gonna let h win. Let's just start the game" Leo said.

They play until the sun is no longer there. In the end, Hyuk's team wins.

"Whay did Ken just said!? Taekwoon won't let Hyukkie lose." Ravi compilained. They are now heading to their shared apartment.

"That's hyung for you. And yeah you're right, Taekwoonie just can't resist Hyukkies aegyo." N said.

"It's love guys~~~" hyuk said, swaying left to right.

"Yeah yeah. Whatever." Jaehwan said.

Hongbin just stares their back. He was supposed to be the one holding Hyuk's hands. It shouldn't be Taekwoon Hyung. If only he remembers. How he wished he would also forget. But he can't and he will never be.

 


	2. Daily Struggle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cross posted on AFF & Wattpad

Another day. Another day to face the truth that he's the only one who can remember. Too bad it's summer, a long day to suffer. It's much better to have class so that he can divert his attention into studies.

"YAH!! LEE HONGBIN!! Get your ass off your bed now or I'll kick you out." N's booming voice made him out of his trance. "Hyung! Why so early!? We don't have school, duh~" seriously, what was Hakyeon's purpose on waking him up this early?

"Just wake up and come out of your room, coz' we'll be having a meeting." N answered, voice getting louder.

\---------

They all sat on the living room. Wonshik was half lying on the couch, eyes barely open. Jaehwan was well seated beside Ravi, he seems the only one who is interested in the 'meeting'. Leo was seating on the love couch and Hyuk was sitting beside him, head resting on Leo's chest. This leaves Hongbin on the floor.

"Now, my kids. I was planning to make this summer to be the best. So, I want to have a vacation but I don't know where? Any suggestions?" Hakyeon said, standing in front of them with his both hands on his waist.

"Let's go to Japan hyung!" Hyuk said, suddenly feeling energetic.

"Why so?" N asked.

"Because that was Naruto and Sasuke's world!" in Hongbin's mind.

"Because that was Naruto and Sasuke's world!" Hyuk answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"You're right Hyukkie!! I wanna see One Piece's boat!!!" Jaehwan agreed to Hyuk.

"How about you Leo?" N ask Leo

"As long as where Hyukkies wants to go." He answered while trying to pull Htuk down. Seriously Hyuk and Jaehwan are now daydreaming about Naruto and One Piece. Hakyeon looked at Hongbin.

"Hhhhmmm, anywhere Hyung." Hongbin said.  
"I don't mind, as long as I can sleep in there." Ravi said.

"Okay!! So now, it's settled. We'll be going to Japan, next week!" N announced happily.  
\--------

"Hyung, where do you want to go?"

"Sapori Coffee Shop?"

"Wooowww, the chocolate is so delicious Hyung!"

"I'll always go back to Japan and eat in here Hyung! With you of course."  
\--------

"Why am I the only one who is first time in Japan!?" Hyuk asked furiously when he found out that he's the only one who's not been there. "When did you went there guys!?"

"A long time ago Hyuk." Hakyeon said seriously.

"Only if you remember Hyuk. You've already been there." Hongbin thought.

"Okay. Leo Hyung! I heard that Sapori Coffee Shop has the best chocolate in Japan! Let's go in there Hyung." Hyuk was now jumping in front of Leo.

"You better not give him too much sugar Leo hyung. Please. He'll be too hyper." Ravi said when he was about to go to the shower.

"I can't promise you guys." Leo plainly said.  
\---------

"You're the best Hyung ever!!! I love the other hyungs but not as I love you Hongbinnie Hyung!! Hyukkiiee loves you so much~~"

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm hungry for comments!


	3. He Can't

"Hyung! Why? Waaahhh. Please, Hongbin Hyung! Help me."

"I can't do anything Hyuk. You need to understand. Leo Hyung is busy."

Hyuk was whining about why does Leo Hyung can't come with them in their vacation in Japan. And now, he's been asking some help to the other hyungs to convince Leo to come.

"But, hyuuuunnnngggg~~"

"Don't worry Hyukkie, I'll be with you in Japan everytime." He assured Hyuk.

"Really Hyung!?" Hyuk ask excitedly.

"Yes, I'll always be with you." He said, words full of sincerity and love.

\-------

They are now in the airport. Leo was the one who drives them to the airport. The elder can't go with them due to family issues.

"Hyuk, please don't do stupid in there. You know that I'm not there to take care of you." Leo reminded Hyuk, he was sad that he can't be with his boyfriend on their vacation.

"Don't worry about me Hyung! Just settle your problem about your family. Hongbin Hyung, will be with me. Right hyung?" Hyuk asks Hongbin.

"Ahm, yeah." Hongbin said awkwardly. He knows that Leo thinks something.

"Oh! That's great, thank you for taking care of him Hongbin-ah." Leo said, voice not totally serious.

Leo hugged Hyuk tightly. He have this feeling that when Hyuk will be back, everything will not be the same. He hopes that his feeling will be wrong.

"I love you Hyung!" Hyuk said, returning the hug.

"I love you too."

He turned to Hongbin, he stared at him. Eyes saying to back off from Hyuk.

But Hongbin can't. He had made his decision last night. This will be his one and only great opportunity to win Hyuk back. He didn't want to hurt Leo but, he just love Hyuk too much.

He shrugged of Leo's glare. He proceed on grabbing his bag, ready to go inside.

"Bye Leo Hyung!"

"Bye Taekwooniee"

"Bye Hyung!"

They all said their goodbyes to Leo.

Hongbin walk beside Hyuk. He wraps his arms to Hyuk's shoulders.

_I'm sorry Taekwoon Hyung, I just can't._

 

 


	4. The Start

The moment they take off from the airplane was the moment he feel familiarity but at the same time uncertainty. He didn't know why. It feels weird.

"Are you okay Hyukkie?" Hakyeon ask, he feels that Hyuk was too quite by the time they make their way outside the airport.

"Yes, I'm okay Hyung." Hyuk assured him with a smile not reaching on his eyes.

And they fell silent. They are now in a van that Hakyeon rented to send them to their hotel. Everyone was asleep except for Sanghyuk and Hakyeon.

"Don't worry Hyukkie, you'll enjoy here even that Taekwonnie is not here." Hakyeon said, he had this feeling that this trip will not turn out as what he expected. His too stupid to think that bringing Hyuk back in here will make everything to be okay, but it's not. He just hope for the best.

 

 

 

\------

 

 

 

Hyuk feel a bit dizzy as he unpack his things from his bag. He just shrugged it off thinking that it's just jet lag.

But he's too wrong, several minutes have passed by just not minding the dizziness, he felt an immense pain from his head. He clutched his head hoping it will ease the pain but suddenly he sees a flood of images, or memories? He didn't know. He see him and Hongbin together kissing, cuddling, him smilling to Hongbin, Hongbin hugging him from the back. Too many images flood through his mind. Until he can't take it anymore, he calls for help.

"H-hyung!" He scream or whisper. The pain on his head and the sudden memories makes him weak.

Luckily, Wonshik passed by on Sanghyuk's room when he heard him. He immediately flings the door open. Revealing the maknae clutching his head in pain.

Wonshik immediately run towards the maknae, trying to lift him up.

"Hyung! Help!" He yelled. "Hyukkie? What happened?" He asks the maknae that was whimpering in his arms.

A couple of minutes later, the others came and rushed to them.

"What happened?!" Hongbin immediately asks.

"I don't know, I just heard him screaming and when I entered the room, he was like this." Wonshik explains.

"We need to bring him to the hospital!" Hakyeon shrieked. "Hyukkie, please stay awake." He said to Hyuk, who was now half conscious in Wonshik's arms.

But he didn't, when they are about to carry Hyuk outside the room. He passed out.

 

 


	5. The Past

"Kids, we have a new addition in our class! Please treat him well, introduce your name little one." Their homeroom teacher let them gather around the room, saying that they'll be having a new friend.

"I-im Han Sanghyuk, but just call me Hyukkie because Mommy said that you need to be comfortable with your friends. Please take care of me." Sanghyuk said then bowed. He's still confused as to why his Mommy and Daddy left him here. The kids around just look at him.

"Okay Hyukkie, just sit beside Hakyeon. Hakyeon please raise your hand."

Sanghyuk sat beside Hakyeon. "Hi." He said, trying to be friendly.

"Hello Hyukkie! OMO! You're so cute!" Hakyeon said while hugging him.

"Hakyeon, you're choking him." Someone behind them said coldly, but Sanghyuk was grateful because he's running out of breath.

"Oh sorry! Hyukkie, this cold guy is Taekwoon! We call him Leo because he likes to cuddle his Lion doll when he sleeps. " Hakyeon said by the time he released Sanghyuk from a bear hug.

Before Sanghyuk can greet Taekwoon, he was already dragged towards to another group of kids.

"Hyukkie! This is Jaehwan but his sister call him Ken so also us. Ken, this is Hyukkie."

"Gosh! You're so cute! Can we take him Hyung!? OMG he's so cute! I can give you one of my chopper dolls! You're as cute as Chopper! Can you be mine?" Ken said while pinching Sanghyuk's cheeks.

"It hurts hyung..." he muttered.

"Enough Ken! And Hyukkie, this lazy guy is Wonshik. We call him Ravi but we don't know why." Hakyeon pointed to the kid who is sleeping on the corner.

"And this is Hongbin. We call him whatever we want." Hakyeon introduced the boy with a beautiful dimples.

Hongbin just stared at him, as if deciding if he wants to befriend Sanghyuk. And then he suddenly touch Sanghyuk's cheeks.

"You're so white. Are you a snow? I thought you're warm, I thought you're cold. Are you an angel? Why does your lips so red? Do you bite it often? And you're so cute." Hongbin asked him so many questions.

"My mommy and daddy are white so that's why I'm white too. And daddy said, I'm warm because I'm alive. My mommy called me her angel but I don't think so because I once tried to jump off my bed to fly but I only fell and hurt my knee. I always eat strawberries and cherries maybe that's the reason my lips are red. And you're cute too." He replied.

"Can I taste you?" Hongbin asks.

Sanghyuk connected his lips to Hongbin's.

"Did you taste it now?" He asks when they parted. "I don't think it taste sweet because maybe it only taste colgate."

"Ken hyung! You can't own Hyukkie! Hyukkie is mine!" Hongbin shouted to Ken the hug him.

_And that's how it started._   
_They didn't notice Taekwoon's longing stare to Sanghyuk._

  
  


 


	6. Was Triggered

When Sanghyuk fell unconscious, Wonshik immediately called an ambulance. When the call was ended, he turn his attention to Sanghyuk who was now leaning limply into Hongbin. Hongbin was shaking him, hoping to get a response but he didn't get any. A few minutes later, the paramedics came and place Sanghyuk into a stretcher. They didn't even argue on who will be the one to be with Sanghyuk in the ambulance, it's already obvious that Hongbin wants to be with him. The whole ride, Hongbin was just holding Sanghyuk's hands. The paramedics attached something on Sanghyuk's arms in which Hongbin guessed to read on his blood pressure and pulse. Hongbin never let go his hands, squeezing it, as if it makes Sanghyuk response. He just didn't know what to do, he was so afraid.

  
Hakyeon and the others called for a taxi to follow the ambulance. The ride was too silent, they were also afraid on Sanghyuk. They didn't want to feel what they experienced two years ago, in which Sanghyuk was also rushed to the hospital.

"Is he going to be okay?"  
"Should we call Taekwoon?"

Jaewhan's voice was the only thing they heard throughout the ride. They want to answer him, but they didn't know what to response.

Hakyeon was thinking that it was all of his fault on why Sanghyuk became like that. He shouldn't approved on having their vacation here in Japan. That's few of the things that keeps on bothering Hakyeon throughout the ride.

 

 

 

\-------

 

 

 

When the ambulance arrived in the hospital. The paramedics immediately pulled the stretcher out and placed Sanghyuk on a gurney that was already waiting in front of the emergency room. Hongbin was with Sanghyuk until he was ushered in the chairs beside the emergency room, he was not allowed to enter the room.

So, he just sit on one of the hard chairs. Head looking down. Tears threatening to fall. This feeling was so familiar, but he didn't want to feel this again. It's frightening him, he's scared that Sanghyuk would never be back.

10 minutes later, Jaewhan, Hakyeon and Wonshik came. They sit beside Hongbin who's head was down.

Hongbin looked up to them, eyes brimming with tears.

"Hyung... I'm afraid." He uttered, voice above a whisper.

"We know, we're also afraid.. Let's just wait okay? Maybe I'll call Taekwoon after this." Hakyeon assured them, after that they all fell silent. The atmosphere was too thick. No one even dared to speak, even Jaehwan.

After almost 2 hours of waiting. The light in the emergency room turned into red, indicating that the operation was done. All of them was now trembling on the inside, they were afraid on what would be the doctor will tell them.

And the doctor opened the door.

"Han Sanghyuk's family?" The doctor said, looking left and right.

"We are." Wonshik answered.

"How are you related to the patient?" The doctor asked.

"We're his childhood bestfriends." It's Jaehwan who answered.

"Okay, I'm Doctor Hiro. As I see, the patient was already suffering from Post Traumatic Amnesia. May I ask, how long was he like this? And how he become like this?" The doctor intrigued.

"It's been two years doc, it's because he was once involved into a car accident that gives a big impact on his brain parts." Hakyeon explained.

"Oh, that's why. But... Do you have any ideas, why something triggered his memories? I guess, you're not from here. Are you Koreans?"

"We didn't know why, we just saw him on his room clutching his head. And yes we're not from here, we're from Korea. But I think it's because before the accident two years ago, he's been here." Wonshik was the one who answered.

"The patient experienced a great head pain today maybe because his memories from here flashed piece by piece on his mind. And I guess, his memories here in Japan are too important to him that's why it triggered. Let's just help him understand those memories, but just slowly. Don't pressure him, he may not take it and collapse again. Because, the only cure for amnesia is time, so please be patient on him." The doctor said.

"How is he? Can we see him?" Hongbin asked.

"We sedated him so that he won't be longer in pain. Don't worry he's okay, he'll just be out for a day. And yes, you can now see him." Doctor Hiro answered. "He's in room 246, just call me if you have any questions."

 

 

 

\------

 

 

 

"Taekwonnie?" Hakyeon said by the time Taekwoon answered the phone.

"Oh! Hakyeon! Where's Hyukkie? He didn't answered my calls, is he okay?" Taekwoon asked, worried.

"Ahm,, Sanghyuk's in the hospital right now...."

"What!? No! Why!?" Taekwoon shrieked.

Hakyeon was taken aback, he never heard Taekwoon in that kind of voice.

"I think his memories are coming back." Hakyeon answered.

"I'll be there."

And Taekwoon ended the call.

 

 

 


	7. His Side

Ever since they were a child, Hakyeon already hold a very special part in his heart for Taekwoon. He only realized that it was more than a brotherly love when they were in High School. That's why anything that Taekwoon wants, he'll grant it as long as he can. Even if it means that it can hurt someone, as long as Taekwoon is happy with it then he will.

Just like him liking Taekwoon, Taekwoon also like Sanghyuk very much. And it was Hakyeon who knew it first, he was Taekwoon's bestfriend after all. He was always with Taekwoon all the time, in bad and good times. He was also there when Taekwoon was broken when Hongbin and Sanghyuk were officially dating. He held Taekwoon all night because the younger didn't stop crying until he fell asleep. He was always with him when Taekwoon was sad all the time he saw Sanghyuk with Hongbin.

Everytime Hongbin and Sanghyuk will have a big fight, Taekwoon will be the one to comfort Sanghyuk, even if Hakyeon didn't like the idea because Taekwoon's way of comforting Sanghyuk makes the problem worst. But he didn't have any guts to tell Taekwoon to stop because the younger is happy with it. Sanghyuk was just too naive to notice that Taekwoon's way of helping him made him and Hongbin worst.

Because of the one-sided and too much love of Hakyeon to Taekwoon, he made the biggest mistake in his life.

 

 

 

\-------

 

 

 

_"Where are you going?" Hakyeon ask to Taekwoon who was grabbing his jacket and car keys._

_"Sanghyuk called me, they had a fight again." Taekwoon said and opened the door, not bothering to say goodbye to Hakyeon._

_Hakyeon only sighed. Taekwoon would never look at him the way he look the younger. Taekwoon only love Sanghyuk and will never love him. Only he can do for the one he loved is to support him no matter what._

 

 

 

\-------

 

 

 

_"Hello? Is this Jung Taekwoon?" Hakyeon heard on the other line._

_"No, this is his friend. His having a bath. Why? And who is this please?" He replied._

_"Do you by any chance knew Han Sanghyuk and Lee Hongbin?" The speaker said._

_"Yes, why?"_

_"I'm from the local police, I would like to inform you that the both of them were involved in a car accident this dawn. They are confined in Taesan Hospital right now." And the call ended._

_After that, everything was blur to him. All he remembered is that he was driving and Taekwoon keep on telling him to drive fastly. Until they arrived in the said hospital. He remembered calling Wonshik and Jaehwan._

_They found out that Sanghyuk was in a deep coma and Hongbin only have a few wounds._

_"Hyung... I'm afraid." That's what Hongbin said after he broke out crying, he kept on muttering 'I'm sorry' and 'It's my fault' until the nurses sedated him to keep him from hurting himself further._

_After two weeks, Sanghyuk was awake. But, it made them all shocked. Sanghyuk never remember every single one of them._

_And that's the start of Hakyeon's biggest mistake._

 

 


	8. It Can't Be

When Taekwoon arrived in Japan, he immediately went to the hospital where Sanghyuk was confined.

He was depressed, Sanghyuk doesn't need to remember. He'll die if it happens.

When he was at the hospital, he was about to go inside Sanghyuk's room but Hakyeon immediately pulled his arms and bring him to the hospital's rooftop.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? I NEED TO SEE HIM!?" Taekwoon yelled, he was desperate to see Sanghyuk.

"We need to stop this!"

"Stop what?" He countered.

"Stop remaking his memories!" Hakyeon yelled, he now really feel guilty. "This is wrong, this is all wrong..." His voice faltered.

"No! It's Hongbin's fault why Sanghyuk became like this! Sanghyuk doesn't deserve to remember him, he doesn't deserve to be remembered."

"You're fooling yourself Taekwoon, Sanghyuk will never loved you. He's just blinded by the memories that you made when in fact, it's not true. It's just your fantasy (my fantasy ✌)"

"And you're fooling yourself also. I. WILL. NEVER. LOVE. YOU. CHA HAKYEON." Taekwoon hardly said then walk away.

Hakyeon was left in there. Crying his eyes out.

 

 

 

\-------

 

 

 

When he reached Sanghyuk's ward, the door was slightly opened. Curious, he didn't immediately went inside.

"I remembered being with Hongbin hyung, not with Taekwoon hyung." He heard Sanghyuk said.

"Are you sure Hyukkie?" It's Jaehwan's voice.

"Yes... Where is Hongbin hyung?" Sanghyuk asked.

"He and Wonshik back in the hotel to get some things. Why? Should call him?"

Taekwoon decided to let himself in. He saw that Jaehwan was bout to grabbed his phone on his pocket to probably call Hongbin.

"No need to. I can answer your questions Hyukkie." He said, standing beside Sanghyuk's hospital bed

 

 


	9. Kim Wonshik

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Take Note: This chapter happened on the past

Kim Wonshik was Hongbin's bestfriend since as long as they can remember. Everything about each other, they all knew about it. So when Wonshik saw Hongbin's face by the time he opened the door for him and Sanghyuk, he already know that something was wrong.

"Are you two okay? Hongbin-ah are you okay?" He asked immediately.

"Yes." They answered in unison, then Sanghyuk entered the house leaving him and Hongbin there.

"What's the problem?" He asked again.

"Just stuff... Let's play video games Hyung." Hongbin changed the subject.

Wonshik just shrugged it off, but he put that in mind to interrogate the younger later. Because he himself has something to say to him also.

They are playing for about two hours now while Jaewhan and Sanghyuk are watching a movie in the living room so Wonshik and Hongbin occupied Jaewhan's bedroom when he decided to tell the younger his plan.

"I'm planning to confess to Jaehwan Hyung tonight." He stated, eyes focused on the game.

He feel that Hongbin stilled.

"THAT'S GREAT HYUNG!" Okay, he expected that reaction but he can feel that something was really bothering his bestfriend.

"Spill it Lee Hongbin." He end their game then faced Hongbin.

"Spill what Hyung?"

"I know that something was off, and I want you to tell me." He said, seriously.

Hongbin's face immediately changed, then the younger cried. He hugged Hongbin, letting the younger cry on his chest. Wonshik was shocked, Hongbin barely cries. He only cries when he is at fault or it's something related to his family.

He waited for Hongbin to finally stop crying.

"So, tell me. What's wrong?" He asked again when Hongbin's tears were dried.

"Hyung... I did something stupid. No! Not stupid, it's unforgivable, disgusting an--" he decided to cut off Hongbin since he noticed that he was about to cry again.

"What did you do?"

"I cheated."

"What?" He think he heard wrong.

"I cheated hyung, I cheated on Sanghyuk." Hongbin said then cried again.

"THE F*CK!? HOW!?" He's now mad, he knows that Hongbin really loved Sanghyuk but why did he cheated? Wonshik also cared for Sanghyuk so he had the right to be mad to Hongbin.

"It's just, I don't know hyung. I was drunk and we were fighting at that time. And Gongchan is the only person who's with me." Hongbin explained, he is now crying hardly.

"GONGCHAN!? OF ALL PEOPLE, WHY HIM? YOU KNOW HOW SANGHYUK HATED HIM!" Wonshik spatted.

Wonshik was now furious, he's now really mad. He was about to add something when he was interrupted by someone.

"What's happening in here? Hongbin why are you crying?" Jaewhan asked, he's in the door of the room. He probably heard Wonshik shouting.

"Nothing hyung." Hongbin answered, drying his tears.

"NOTHING!?" Wonshik shouted. "IT'S NOT HONGBIN!"

"No hyung, please don't tell them. Don't tell him."

"Tell what?" And the three of them turned their attention to the person who asked that.

"I don't know either Sanghyuk." Jaewhan said. Voice demanding an answer from the two.

"What it is Hyungs?" Sanghyuk asked to Hongbin and Wonshik.

"I know that something happened on that day Hongbin, so I guess you admitted it to Wonshik Hyung. Care to say it also to me?" Sanghyuk said.

They all can sense that Sanghyuk was serious. He barely called Hongbin by his real name.

"Hyukkie, I think we need to talk about it in the house. Not here." Hongbin said, face starting to pale.

"No Hongbin, since you said it to Wonshik hyung. I think I deserve to know it, not minding the place. Why? Is that, that heavy that you're afraid that someone would know beside Wonshik Hyung?" Sanghyuk said hardly to Hongbin.

"Hongbin-ah, I think Sanghyuk is right. It can help if you say it now." Jaewhan added.

Wonshik didn't expect what happened next. Hongbin just dragged Sanghyuk out of the apartment, Jaehwan and him also followed outside.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? LET'S TALK IN HERE LEE HONGBIN!" Sanghyuk yelled, prying his hands off from Hongbin. Wonshik can see that Hongbin's grip to Sanghyuk's arms were too tight. He thinks that Sanghyuk's hands will bruise.

"NO! I'LL EXPLAIN IT TO YOU IN OUR APARTMENT!" Hongbin also yelled.

Hongbin harshly opened his car and almost throw Sanghyuk inside, beside the drivers seat. Then he immediately get inside and speed the car.

  
"What just happened?" Jaehwan asked to Wonshik.

Wonshik didn't expect that his plan for tonight will be postponed because of the call he received from Hakyeon that night.

 

 

 

 


	10. Favor

"You know? I still don't understand why Sanghyuk forgets you and remember Taekwoon hyung instead." Wonshik stated, he saw that for a while Hongbin stopped stuffing some of Sanghyuk's clothes on a bag.

"What do you mean Hyung?" Hongbin asked, he's back on packing.

"Like, it's really impossible for Sanghyuk to remember that Taekwoon was you who's he's dating for? Replacing you to Taekwoon Hyung. I don't think it makes sense." Wonshik continued.

"The doctor already explained that to us Hyung."

"That it's because you had fight before the accident? So, Sanghyuk's mind blocked you on his memory? And of all people, why Taekwoon though?" Wonshik asked, he's keeping these on his mind for a while now.

"Because it's Taekwoon Hyung who comforts him whenever we had a fight. You know hyung? I don't care all about that. It's my fault why it happened, at least Sanghyuk is alive. Now let's go, he's probably awake now." Hongbin cut off the topic. He immediately went outside of Sanghyuk's hotel room.

Wonshik has no choice, he just shut his mouth then followed Hongbin.

 

 

 

\------

 

 

 

"Jaewhan-ah, Hakyeon is looking for you." Taekwoon told Jaewhan.

Jaewhan hesitates to leave, but Taekwoon's stare at him leaves no room for  arguement. So he immediately went inside Sanghyuk's hospital room to find Hakyeon.

After half an hour of searching, he found Hakyeon on the rooftop crying.

"Hyung! Are you okay? Why are you crying!?" He crouched down on Hakyeon's side.

"Oh.. Jaewhan-ah what are you doing here?" Hakyeon instead ask, he wipes his tears.

"Hyung, why are you crying?" Jaewhan asked again.

"Nothing, just a little misunderstanding with Taekwoon. Why are you here by the way? Is Sanghyuk awake?"

"Yes he is, Taekwoon hyung said you were looking for me." He replied.

Hakyeon's face turned into confused one.

"Ah, yeah. I need to tell you something." Hakyeon said, face now change into serious one.

"What is it hyung?" He asks.

"About Sanghyuk's condition, I ne--" Hakyeon was cut off by Jaewhan.

"No. Don't tell me hyung, you're going to ask me again to make some damn stories about Sanghyuk being with Taekwoon hyung instead of Hongbin!?" Jaewhan said. He didn't want to make that stories again. He felt guilty for Hongbin and Sanghyuk.

"Please... Jaewhan. Help me, this would be the last." Hakyeon begged.

Jaewhan really hate this. Hakyeon begging to him. He really can't say no when the older will ask something for him. He really love Hakyeon, he have done a lot for him. And when Hakyeon begged, it's the only thing that Jaewhan can return on what Hakyeon has done to him after all.

"Hyung. I can't." He denied.

"Please, for me Jaewhan. For me, please." Hakyeon was now crying.

"This is not for you Hyung, this is for Taekwoon hyung. You're doing this for him, not for you." He explained.

"I love him Jaewhan-ah, you know that. I'll do anything for him." Hakyeon said.

"Doing this will hurt you Hyung."

"It's okay, as long as his happy." Hakyeon replied, still crying.

"Okay, this would be the last time that I'll support your blindness hyung. But after this, I won't." Jaewhan give in, he then hugged Hakyeon.

"Thanks a lot Jaewhan-ah. I really owe you." Hakyeon said while sobbing on Jaewhan's chest.

"No hyung, I still owe you. And please be happy, okay?"

He felt that Hakyeon nodded.

"One last thing Jaewhan-ah. Can you please stop Wonshik on saying something?" Hakyeon said when they pulled away from the hug.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"Wonshik is smart. I knew that all of this doesn't make sense. And he's on Hongbin's side, you know that. So please stop your boyfriend." Hakyeon explained.

"Yeah right. I'll try hyung."

"Now, let's go to Hyukkie?" Hakyeon said.

 

 


	11. Full of Lies

"Hyung.. I can't understand anything. I don't know what's real now Hyung."

That's what Taekwoon heard by the time Jaewhan left Sanghyuk's hospital room.

"What do you mean Hyukkie?" He asked, as he grabbed Sanghyuk's hand then held it.

"I remembered some of my memories in the past Hyung. And why it's not you? Why it is Hongbin Hyung instead?" Sanghyuk said, voice full of confusion.

Taekwoon sighed.

"You really want to know?"

Sanghyuk nodded.

"I don't really want to say this to you, because I don't want you to get hurt. But if this what make you happy, then I'll tell you everything Sanghyuk~ah." Taekwoon said, he sit on a chair beside Sanghyuk's hospital bed.

"But before I'll tell you everything, can you tell me what you remembered?"

"I remembered, being here in Japan with Hongbin Hyung. I'm kissing him and hugging him. Doing things what couple does with him Hyung." Sanghyuk replied.

"Okay... Yes, what you remembered is true. It all happens because Hongbin was really in love with you Hyukkie. But you love me and I love you too. Hongbin got mad and he lied to you. He made stories that make you hate me. And with that, he offered you to go to Japan saying to help you move on. But in fact, it's to make you away from me." Taekwoon stopped, looking Sanghyuk's unreadable expression.

"Then?" Sanghyuk asked.

"Then you found out about his lies and then you went back to Korea and that's when the accident happened. But Sanghyuk~ah, just please don't hate Hongbin. He's just blinded by his love to you." Taekwoon ended the story.

By this time, Sanghyuk was now crying.

"Hyung... I'm sorry for believing him. I am so sorry." Sanghyuk said while crying hardly.

"No. No, don't cry please. It's okay." Taekwoon said then wiped Sanghyuk's tears and hugged him.

"You're too kind Hyung, you still forgive Hongbin Hyung. I don't think I can forgive him for what he have done to me, to you and to us." Sanghyuk said.

"No, don't hate him Sanghyuk~ah. He's our friend after all." Taekwoon replied.

"I don't know hyung."

"Please?" Taekwoon plead.

"O-okay hyung." Sanghyuk replied.

"Now, why don't you go to sleep?" Taekwoon said, slowly laying Sanghyuk back to bed.

After a few seconds, Sanghyuk was now deep asleep.

_I'm sorry Hyuk~ah, I just love you so much. Hongbin already broke your heart, I'll never let him have you again. He already missed his chance._

Taekwoon just looked at Sanghyuk sleeping the entire night.

 

 

 

\------

 

 

 

Wonshik and Hongbim arrived at the hospital by midnight. By that time, Sanghyuk was still asleep. Jaewhan was sleeping on the couch and beside him was Hakyeon, still awake. But what surprised them was Taekwoon being in there, sitting on a chair beside Sanghyuk's hospital bed fingers laced with Sanghyuk's.

"Hyung!? What are you doing here?" Hongbin asked when he noticed Taekwoon's presence.

"Hakyeon told me what happened, and of course being the boyfriend, I rushed from Korea to here in Japan." Taekwoon replied to Hongbin.

Hongbin noticed that when Taekwoon said the word 'boyfriend' it's full of emphasize.

"Yeah right, but did he wake up now already hyung? Did the doctor said something?" Hongbin questioned when he put Sanghyuk's bag in the corner of the room.

"Yes he is. And the doctor said something." Hakyeon was the one to reply.

"What it is Hyung?" Wonshik asked, he now grabbed Jaewhan's head to lay on his lap.

"The doctor said not to say something about Sanghyuk's past. Just let him remember bit by bit." Taekwoon replied.

When Wonshik heard that, he knows something is going. He didn't believe on what Taekwoon said. So he carefully pulled-off Jaewhan's head on his lap, he then went outside the room. Not caring to say something to Hakyeon, Taekwoon and Hongb

 


	12. Truth

Wonshik went to the Nurse Station to inquire about Sanghyuk's Doctor.

"Sir? What can I do for you?" The nurse asked when he noticed Wonshik coming.

"I want to talk to Sanghyuk's doctor regarding to his condition." Wonshik replied.

"Okay sir, I'll lead you to Dr. Hiro's office." The nurse said, going out to the counter.

Then the nurse lead the way to the doctor's room. After five minutes of walking, the nurse halts in front of a door. When Wonshik read the words in the door, it indicates 'Dr. Hiro'.

The nurse knocked three times when they heard a soft 'come in', and so they come inside.

"Oh, Ms. Lee what do you want?" The doctor asked when they entered.

"Ahm, Mr...?"

"Kim." Wonshik supplied.

"Mr. Kim, wants to ask about Sanghyuk's condition sir so I brought him here." The nurse continued.

"Okay, have a seat Mr. Kim. Nurse Lee, you can now leave. Thank you for escorting Mr. Kim here." The doctor said, motioning Wonshik to seat in front of his desk.

"No problem doc!" The nurse replied then went outside the room.

"What do you want to ask Mr. Kim?" The doctor begun.

"I want to know the truth about Sanghyuk's condition." Wonshik replied.

"What do you mean? Did his doctor in Korea didn't explained it?" The doctor asked, sounding confused.

"I think he explained it, but for me it doesn't make any sense."

"Continue Mr. Kim." The doctor said when he sensed that Wonshik was growing hesitant.

"I know nothing about stuff like this but I don't think that it's impossible for someone to forget a certain person and replace it with another person." He replied.

"Okay, I don't get it can you please explain further?" The doctor said, now fully focused on what Wonshil was saying.

"Sanghyuk's doctor in Korea said that Sanghyuk has an amnesia. In that part, I believed it. But when we talked to Sanghyuk when we knew he was already conscious, he remembered all of us, except for his boyfriend Hongbin. And what shocked us the most is that he thinks Hongbin is Taekwoon." He said.

"Then, what the doctor said about that?"

"He said that Sanghyuk's memory have blocked Hongbin and instead replaced Taekwoon in it, saying that it is because apparently Sanghyuk unconsciously blamed Hongbin why the accident happened." He continued.

"Look Mr. Kim, that case is possible. It is because our unconscious mind never forgets, that's why Sanghyuk blocked Hongbin on his memory. But, it won't take long, as what I said, it is the unconscious mind that blocked it so eventually Sanghyuk will do remember him with the help of the people around him. According to studies, it would usually last for a maximum of six months only. But, it would only reach six months if no one will help him remember. For Sanghyuk's case, it's impossible because his friends were around him especially Hongbin. Didn't you help him remember?" The doctor explained.

"No we didn't, because the doctor said that we should let him remember on his own."

"But, you explained to Sanghyuk that it's Hongbin not Taekwoon?"

"We didn't also, the doctor said that it would make the situation worse."

"God. That explains, why. How can a doctor say something wrong? Is he dumb?" The doctor said in disbelief.

"I think he's not. Maybe someone forced him to make that diagnosis." Wonshik said, now he was angry. He already knew who did all of this.

"Who?" The doctor asked.

Wonshik stood.

"Thank you so much Doctor Hiro, but I can't tell you who. Just please do me a favor."

"Anything, as long as I can." The doctor replied, looking up to now the standing Wonshik.

"Please don't tell anyone. Just act you didn't know anything."

"Okay, just make sure that my patient will be fine."

And with that Wonshik went outside the room, but he was surprised on who he saw behind those doors.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO KIM WONSHIK!?"

  
  


 


	13. Heartbreaking Choice

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO KIM WONSHIK!?"

That's what Wonshik heard when he closed the door. And he was taken aback when he saw who it is.

It's Jaewhan.

  
"What do you mean?" He asked, wait? Did Jaewhan knew this bullshits?

"What did you talk about with Sanghyuk's doctor?" Jaewhan asked again.

"You knew all of this!?" He shouted, he can't believe that Jaewhan know all about this but didn't tell anything to him. "You know? Yet, you didn't tell me anything? How could you!?" He yelled, he's now angry, why would Jaewhan let these things happened to Hongbin and Sanghyuk?

"I was about to say it to you, but--"

"But what?"

"But, I know you won't approved all of this." Jaewhan continued.

"Yes, I won't. And I know you won't either. But why?" He said in disbelief.

"You know that I will always be on Hakyeon Hyung's side. I don't have any choice but to support him. He begged to me Wonshik~ah." Jaewahn said with guilt and sadness.

"Hakyeon Hyung? Why would he do all of this? I thought he cared for us? Especially for Hongbin and Sanghyuk, but why?" He asked in confusion.

"Let's talk about this on a cafe downstairs Wonshik~ah this is not the proper place to talk something really serious like this." Jaewhan said sternly.

So, even though Wonshik badly want to know now he just let Jaewhan dragged him into the elevator. After all, he love Jaewhan so what Jaewhan wants, he'll obey.

When they arrived at the cafe, Jaewhan ordered two cappuccinos. And they started talking after the waiter served their order.

"So, continue." Wonshik ordered. Jaewhan takes a little sip of the coffee first before he started talking.

"You know, starting from we were just kids Taekwoon Hyung already loves Sanghyuk and Hakyeon Hyung also loves Taekwoon Hyung."

"What?" Wonshik cut off Jaewhan. "They already had this one-sided love for a long time?"

"Won't you let me finish?" Jaewhan shrieked.

"Okay, I'm sorry. I swear, I won't interrupt you anymore, I'll just listen." Wonshik said, laughing. Jaewhan was too cute for his liking.

"So yeah, they both have one-sided love. And when Sanghyuk and Hongbin started dating officially, that's when it all started. Didn't you notice before that whenever Hongbin and Sanghyuk had a fight, Taekwoon hyung will always be the one to comfort Sanghyuk but the problem's getting worse?" Jaewhan asked him.

"Yeah, now it all makes sense." He answered, remembering the times Hongbin would come to him saying that they had a fight again.

"That's because Taekwoon Hyung wants Sanghyuk for him only and not for Hongbin. So when the accident happens, Taekwoon somehow changed Sanghyuk's memories, I don't really know how he did it but I was just suddenly asked by Hakyeon Hyung to help him and Taekwoon Hyung. I didn't agree at first but when Hakyeon Hyung begged to me, I really can't say no. I badly want to tell this to you but I know that you'll always be on Hongbin's side." Jaewhan finished.

"Hyung... We really need to stop this. Hongbin is suffering so much. And we just changed Sanghyuk's life. This is not right Hyung." Wonshik said, now determined to stop all of this.

"No, I promised Hakyeon Hyung." Jaewhan said stubbornly.

Wonshik was shocked, he thought that Jaewhan will listen to him but it was the opposite.

"Jaewhan, but this is all wrong." He was now starting to be mad again.

"I know! As much as I want to help you and Hongbin and not to lie to Sanghyuk anymore but this is for Hakyeon Hyung, this made him happy so I'll do this." Jaewhan said, voice getting higher.

"Made him happy? You know for a fact that it's not Jaewhan! It's hurting him! I also love Hakyeon Hyung even Taekwoon Hyung, I love them both but this thing was all a joke. They are just lying to their selves!"

"But, at least it made them smile. Sanghyuk is fine for this. Did you ever notice him being sad with Taekwoon Hyung? And Hongbin, just seeing Sanghyuk happy made him happy. So what's your problem about this? Can't you see? Everyone was just fine!" Jaewhan countered.

"Yes! Sanghyuk is fine being with Taekwoon hyung because he didn't remember anything! He was just being lied for fucking two years! And what if he remembers again? Hongbin was just trying to be happy but I know deep inside he was dying! He was still blaming himself for what happened. Lee Jaewhan! Wake up! Everything was not fine!" He shouted, he slammed the table causing the coffee to spill. He just can't believe that Jaewhan was talking and thinking all of this nonsense. It's not the Lee Jaewhan he know and loved.

"We won't let that happen. I won't let Sanghyuk remember! I don't care! I don't care about Hongbin!" Jaewhan also shouted.

And that's it, Wonshik was now pissed like as fuck. How could Jaewhan said that?

"What? Is that you Jaewhan? How could you say that to Hongbin and Sanghyuk? What kind of Hyung are you?" He said plainly, trying to control his anger.

Jaewhan was now afraid, because when Wonshik used that tone, it means that he was really angry and just trying to stay calm. But Jaewhan was also angry, why would just Wonshik won't understand him!? But to tell honestly, he was also shocked on what he said, but he won't be taking it back.

"Maybe I'm not a good hyung for them and for you, but I can be a good dongsaeng for Hakyeon and Taekwoon hyung. So I'm pleading you Kim Wonshik to not say anything to Hongbin, just please stay out of this." He said, looking directly to Wonshik's eyes.

"Are you expecting me to do that?" Wonshik asked in disbelief.

"Yes, Wonshik please... For me." He pleaded.

"Hongbin is my bestfriend Jaewhan~ah, I'll always be on his side you know that." Wonshik said, not leaving his eyes on Jaewhan's.

"And I am your boyfriend." Jaewhan said, sounding determined.

"Wait, are you trying to make me choose between you and Hongbin!?" Wonshik asked, now feeling tensed. He didn't want to choose between his lover and bestfriend. He both loved them.

"If that's what you're thinking." Jaewhan said, he's now smirking on the inside. He knows that Wonshik will always choose him, no matter what.

"I-i can't choose, Jaewhan." Wonshik said, then stood up. He was about to leave when Jaewhan said something that made his heart break.

"If you dare to leave Kim Wonshik, it means you choose Hongbin. And if that happen's will be over." Jaewhan said.

Wonshik freezed, he's contemplating on which side to choose. He badly wants to help his best friend but he really love Jaewhan.

Jaewhan was now confident that Wonshik would not leave the cafe. He waited for Wonshik to sit again but his tear fell when Wonshik continued walking and left the cafe without sparring a glance to him

 

 

 


	14. Talk

Hongbin was shocked when Wonshik stormed off the room and he got even more shocked when Hakyeon nudged Jaewhan awake and whispered something that made Jaewhan's expression to darken and then probably followed Wonshik outside the room with a loud slam on the door causing Sanghyuk to stir awake.

Hongbin and Taekwoon immediately rushed out to Sanghyuk's side and Hongbin's heart broke when he noticed how Sanghyuk stare at him. Sanghyuk's eyes showed nothing but hatred to him. But he just endured it, at least Sanghyuk is okay now.

"Hey, you okay?" Hongbin asked first but Sanghyuk doesn't answer him and just turned his attention to Taekwoon.

"Hyung, I'm thirsty." Sanghyuk said to Taekwoon.

"Okay, let me get you a water." Taekwoon was about to leave but then Sanghyuk grabs his wrist.

"Don't leave me Hyung." Sanghyuk said, as if his scared to be left alone with Hongbin.

"Let me get it, just stay here Taekwoon." Hakyeon rose from the couch then went outside the room.

And there, Sanghyuk, Taekwoon and Hongbin were left. Hongbin standing on Sanghyuk's side and Taekwoon on the other side. No one ever dared to say something, Taekwoon proceed to just intertwined his fingers to Sanghyuk's. Hongbin was left there, standing awkwardly. His been wondering why Sanghyuk was kinda scared of him, when he didn't do something.

"Why are you here?" He was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard Sanghyuk asked him coldly.

"Of course, to look after you." Hongbin replied, trying to grab Sanghyuk's other free hand but he was taken aback when Sanghyuk pulled his hands away to Hongbin. So Hongbin just unwillingly let his hands fall on his side.

"No need to, Taekwoonnie Hyung is now here. You can go now." Sanghyuk said, as if his annoyed by Hongbin's presence.

And that again, Hongbin felt his heart broke into pieces. He thought that they were okay now, but hearing those words from Sanghyuk. It's like saying that Sanghyuk never needed him when Hongbin needs Sanghyuk all his life.

"I promised that I'll always be with you Hyukkie. Remember? When were just about to go here in Japan?" Hongbin reasoned off, his just convincing his self that maybe Sanghyuk forgot what they've talked about before going in here.

"NO! I DON'T NEED YOU! I HATE YOU!" Sanghyuk shouted, kicking his feet off. It's an indication that he was really annoyed. And Hongbin is on the verge of crying now. Hearing that from Sanghyuk crushed his soul.

"Sanghyuk, I told you not to hate him." Taekwoon said sternly.

"But..." Sanghyuk trailed off, afraid of Taekwoon's voice.

"Let me handle this okay? Just, listen to me okay? Only me." Taekwoon stated to Sanghyuk, softly caressing Sanghyuk's forehead.

Hongbin just stood there, looking his one and only life being taken care of someone when it was supposed to be him. He just forced himself not to cry. But, his really confused as to why Sanghyuk said that.

When Sanghyuk nodded, Taekwoon turned his attention to Hongbin.

"Hongbin~ah let's talk this outside okay?" Taekwoon said then kissed Sanghyuk's forehead.

"We'll talk just for a moment okay? Just wait for Hakyeon to bring your water." Taekwoon said to Sanghyuk.

Taekwoon then walks towards the door and Hongbin also followed. When they were walking outside, they saw Hakyeon coming back with a water bottle and a straw. Hongbin noticed that Hakyeon's eyes were puffy? _Did he cry?_ Hongbin thought.

"Where you two going?" Hakyeon asked.

"Taekwoon hyung needs to talk to me." Hongbin answered, Hakyeon just nodded then spare a very intense look to Taekwoon Hyung who just smirked.

When Hakyeon walked pass through them, Hongbin asked him something.

"Hyung!? Are you okay?" He asked, he's worried for Hakyeon.

"Yes, I am." Hakyeon said, not looking at Hongbin's eyes directly.

"Okay, just rest Hyung okay?" He stated, then followed Taekwoon who was now walking few steps ahead of him.

\-------------

Taekwoon brought him to the Hospital's rooftop.

"I'm sorry for what Sanghyuk said to you earlier." Taekwoon started.

"It's okay hyung. But, may I know why?" He asked.

"He remembered you hurting him before the accident." Taekwoon said.

"Oh." That's what only Hongbin could utter, he can't blame Sanghyuk why.

"Is that only what he said Hyung?" Hongbin tried asking, he's afraid that Sanghyuk might finally remembers what he did on that night.

"Honestly Hongbin, what actually happened before the accident?" Taekwoon asked. "What actually did you do to him?" Taekwoon added.

"I.. I... Didn't do anything hyung. We just yelled at each other. That's it." Hongbin said, he's afraid of telling the truth so he just settled on telling half of what happened.

"Really? And then why did he hate you so much for that?" Taekwoon asked again.

"I don't know." Hongbin answered. His afraid that if he tell Taekwoon on what he did to Sanghyuk in the car that night, the older might hate and not forgive him.

"You know Hongbin, I'm trying my ass of here helping you to be with Sanghyuk again and yet Sanghyuk was getting too attached to me now because of what he remembered." Taekwoon lectured.

"I know, and I'm sorry for that hyung. No words can express how thankful I am to you for helping me and Sanghyuk. I know that it's a burden for acting that you really love Sanghyuk as a lover. Thank you so much Hyung." Hongbin said, he's really thankful for the older, for helping them get through this for over 2 years already. His hyung is just too good.

"It's nothing Hongbin~ah. You know that I cared for the two of you. I only want happiness for the both of you. You two are my dongsaengs, so I love you both so much." Taekwoon said to Hongbin.

"And I love you too Hyung." Hongbin replied.

"But one thing Hongbin." Taekwoon said, voice changing from soft to serious.

"Don't you ever lie to me. Are you sure that's what only happened before the accident?" Taekwoon asked again.

"Y-yes Hyung." Hongbin stuttered. He hates lying to Taekwoon when he knows that the older never lied to him.

"Good. You know how I hate lying and people who lie." Taekwoon said, looking to Hongbin's avoiding gaze to him.

"Now let's go back downstairs, just don't mind Sanghyuk. I already explained to him and I told him not to hate you anymore." Taekwoon said, then walks first. Leaving Hongbin there.

Hongbin looked at Taekwoon's back, then he smiled. He's really lucky to have a friend like Taekwoon, Hakyeon, Jaewhan and Wonshik that will always be there for him.

He then followed Taekwoon but he stopped walking when he felt that his phone was buzzing. He fished out his phone on his pocket then looked that it was Wonshik calling, he was about to answer when the call ended. He noticed that he received 37 missed calls and 11 messages from his bestfriend.

_From: Larva Hyung_

_Hongbin~ah please answer my call. I need to talk to you ASAP_

The other 10 messaged where just the same. Hongbin then called Wonshik back. He was worried about his best friend. He sounded serious.

"I need to talk to you something important Lee Hongbin please immediately come back here in the hotel." That's what he heard from Wonshik when the older answered his call.

So Hongbin immediately walk downstairs then outside the hospital to call a taxi. He needs to hurry, because his best friends voice was hoarse. It's like he had been crying. _Did he Jaewhan hyung had a fight?_ Hongbin taught when he sit in the back of the taxi he called.

But when he returned to the hotel, he was surprised to witness his best friends state.

 

 


	15. Suicide

When Jaewhan was done crying and embarrassing himself on the cafe, he decided to follow Wonshik. And knowing Wonshik so much, he knew that Wonshik was now at the hotel. So he hired a cab to bring him to the hotel.

He already have in mind on how to change Wonshik's decision. He didn't expect the way Wonshik acted a while ago. Saying that it didn't hurt was an understatement, yes he knows very well that what he have ask to Wonshik is a bad thing. Hell he know, what Taekwoon and Hakyeon did over the two years is wrong but yet he didn't have the courage to disobey Hakyeon. It's just that Hakyeon, already sacrificed a lot for him and Wonshik. And doing this would somehow return it, so be it.

Jaewhan just hope that his plan would work. He really really hope, because if not he didn't know what to do anymore. And if Wonshik would spill everything to Hongbin, everything will be in chaos now. As if not already.

When the taxi halts, Jaewhan immediately get off then paid the driver. He then went inside the hotel then let the lift bring him to their floor. When the elevator dings, indicating that he already reached the said floor, he walks and then halted outside his and Wonshik's shared hotel room. Taking a deep breath, he didn't bother to knock then turned the knob revealing a mess Wonshik on the bed.

The younger was sitting on the edge of the bed, head hanging low and clutching on his phone. When Wonshik sensed that there's someone in the room, he then lift his head only to be met by Jaewhan's puffy eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Wonshik asked Jaewhan the he put his phone on the pocket of his jeans.

Jaewhan then dropped his body on the floor while crying. As if begging. Face with a very pitiful state that makes Wonshik's heart break into pieces.

"Please, Wonshik~ah... Don't do this to me please." Jaewhan begged.

"Do what Hyung?" Wonshik instead asked, he's restraining himself from consoling his boyfriend or ex-boyfriend rather. But Wonshik didn't want the sound of ex.

"Don't leave me please. I'll die if you will." Jaewhan replied.

"You're the one who make me do this hyung." Wonshik also replied.

"Then don't! Just please listen to me." Jaehwan said, still crying hardly.

"No, it's wrong hyung. I should help Hongbin and Sanghyuk, you also should."

"Please, Wonshik please." Jaewhan plead again.

This time, Wonshik didn't answer. He just stared Jaewhan on the floor begging to him. He's now starting to doubt on his decision. He really love Jaewhan.

Wonshik was confused when Jaewhan suddenly stood then went to the bathroom. Few seconds later, Wonshik's eyes got bigger when he saw what Jaewhan was holding.

A razor.

"What are you planning to do Lee Jaewhan!?" Wonshik shouted. He hoped that Jaewhan won't do what's on his mind.

But instead of answering him, Jaewhan only bring the razor on his wrist as if testing Wonshik's patience.

"Lee Jaewhan. Put that thing down." Wonshik said, he's now afraid on what Jaewhan would do next.

Jaewhan just shook his head, then dragged the razor in his wrist. But not that deep, but it's already enough to make Wonshik in panic.

"Jaewhan! Please!" Wonshik said trying to get closer to Jaewhan but the older only step backwards every time Wonshik would take a step forward.

"Now. How does it feel to beg?" Jaewhan said, gripping the razor so hard that causing it to dig on his palm making it bleed.

"Jaewhan no, please stop this." Wonshik tried again, he now stopped getting closer to Jaewhan because he noticed that aside from taking steps backward every time he takes a step forward, the older will also tighten his grip on the razor making his palm bleed more.

"Tell me Wonshik, how does it feel to beg? Because, that's what I feel when you make me beg many times today." Jaewhan said hardly, tears rolling down on his face.

"No please, Hyung. Hyung, please." Wonshik tried calling him hyung cause he knows that it's Jaewhan weakness.

"You think that calling me hyung will stop me? No!" Jaewhan shouted then made another cut on his wrist. "It won't! Cause I also did that to you! And it didn't work on you, so why me?" Jaewhan scoffed. He now feels numb.

Wonshik was now crying, witnessing his beloved trying to kill himself crushed his heart.

"Please, you're now hurting yourself. Please stop it now." Wonshik tried again.

"You hurt me first Kim Wonshik! And this? This is nothing compared on how painful it is when you turned my back on me!" Jaewhan said, gripping the razor harder.

"Okay. Okay, I'll do whatever you want! Just please stop hurting yourself Jaewhannie." Wonshik give up, he's now crying hardly. He just want Jaewhan to stop hurting because it hurts him more.

"Really?" Jaewhan asked, voice now soft but still gripping on the razor hardly.

"Yes, I will." Wonshik replied, now trying his luck to come closer to Jaewhan.

"You'll not tell Hongbin anymore?" Jaewhan tested.

"Yes, I wont." Luckily, Jaewhan didn't step backward when Wonshik tried to come closer to him.

So Wonshik immediately engulfed Jaewhan into a tight hug. And now their both crying. Wonshik was so afraid that he might loose Jaewhan, like literally. He don't want to know how would he be if Jaewhan will die.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for turning my back on you. Sorry for hurting you. Sorry for breaking your heart. Sorry for making you cry and sorry for not listening to you. I promise, I'll do anything you want, just please don't do this again okay?" Wonshik poured his thoughts to Jaewhan, the older's head was now burried on Wonshik's chest and Wonshik's face was on the older's hair.

Jaewhan nodded. Wonshik then realized that the older was still gripping on the bloody razor. He pulled from the hug then pry the razor off from the older's hand.

"I'm sorry for bringing you into this mess Wonshik~ah. If only I could stop all of this mess. I am sorry." Jaewahn apologized between his cries.

Wonshik was now busy looking for Jaewhan's cuts.

"Let's get you cleaned up okay? And don't worry, it's not your fault" Wonshik assured him.

Wonshik carried Jaewhan to the restroom. He make Jaewhan sit on the restroom's sink. He then grab a first aid kit after he washed Jaewhan's wounds. They were silent the whole time, Jaewhan only flinched everytime Wonshik applied pressure on his cuts.

Wonshik was relieved that Jaewhan's cuts was not that deep. After he bandaged Jaewhan's wrist and palm, he noticed that the older's eyes was starting to drop. Maybe exhausted for today's happenings.

"You now sleep, we'll talk later." Wonshik sternly said when he carried Jaewhan again, he placed the older on the bed gently, then draped the blanket until Jaewhan's chest.

After 20 minutes, Jaewhan was now fast asleep. When silence engulf the whole room, that's the time when all of what happened processed on his mind. He now realized that he just agreed on lying to Hongbin and he just realized that he'll just gonna lie to his bestfriend.

Wonshik cried, he now feel very guilty to his bestfriend. Hongbin was really a good friend, and now Wonshik would be a bad bestfriend. He will now be one of the people who will hurt Hongbin. And not just Hongbin, also to Sanghyuk.

\-----------

What Hongbin saw was a disaster. Wonshik was sitting on the floor at the end of the bed. He can see blood. He also noticed that Wonshik's shirt has blood stains.

"Hyung? What happened?" He asked, immediately crouching on Wonshik's level. He's really worried like fuck.

He noticed that Wonshik was crying hardly. He tried to lift Wonshik's head so that he can see his face but the older just ducked his head more.

"Please say something hyung. Why is there a blood?" He asked again, he's now also on the verge of crying. He can't bear seeing his bestfriend in a state like this.

Wonshik just pointed on the bed. And then Hongbin realized that Jaewhan was also there, sleeping soundly but tear stains were also visible on his face.

"Hyung, please explain to me. Why is there blood? Are you hurt?" Hongbin asked again.

"I-im so sorry Hongbin~ah. Sorry." That's all Wonshik can say, head still hanging low. He can't dare to stare Hongbin's eyes.

"Wait, did you hurt Jaewhan hyung?" Hongbin asked. He would be mad if Wonshik made Jaewhan bleed, Wonshik is not that kind of a person.

"Yes. And I'm sorry." Wonshik said, crying harder.

"What!?" Hongbin stood then went to Jaewhan's sleeping figure, he then noticed that Jaewhan's wrist and palms were bandaged.

"What did you do to him hyung?" Hongbin shouted and that caused Jaewhan to stir awake.

 

 


	16. Too Late

"Here's your water Hyukkie." That's what Hakyeon said when he opened the door.

"Thanks hyung." Sanghyuk said when Hakyeon handed him the bottle with a straw.

He immediately sip the water inside the bottle, Hakyeon is only watching him drinking the water.

Hakyeon feels very guilty every time he looked at Sanghyuks innocent face. Sanghyuk is such an innocent person, that's why he always believed on what his hyung's will tell him. Because of Sanghyuk's innocence, Hakyeon and Taekwoon took the chance to lie to him. Thinking all of their lies to Sanghyuk makes Hakyeon wants to cry. He loved Sanghyuk like as his dongsaeng, in fact he love them all; Jaewhan, Wonshik and Hongbin. His love for Taekwoon is just to much that caused him to help the younger all of this, but thinking on what Taekwoon said to him last night, he now wants to stop all of this. But his afraid, because if he would ever tell Sanghyuk and Hongbin the truth, maybe all of them would hate him and he hated that. He don't want to be left out, so he decided that to let destiny and time to reveal all of this, he just hoped that they wont hate him too much.

"Hyung? Are you okay?" Sangyuk's question made him out of his thoughts.

"Yes I am, how about you? You feeling better now?" He asked the younger.

"Yes hyung! When can I leave here hyung? I want to go back to Korea now." Sanghyuk replied with a pout.

That made Hakyeon smile, he really love the adorable Sanghyuk.

"I don't know Hyukkie. Why do you want to go home? You still wasn't able to explore Japan." He asked Sanghyuk while patting his head.

"Because, this place reminds me of Hongbin hyung." Sanghyuk said with anger.

"Why? Do you hate Hongbin now?" He asked, worried.

"Yes! I hate him so much! He tried to separate me and Taekwoon hyung! I hate him hyung! I hate him! He's a liar!" Sanghyuk shouted, his flailing his hands with anger. "I hope that Taekwoon hyung will beat Hongbin hyung right now."

"Han Sanghyuk. Hongbin is not like that. And don't say something like that, Hongbin is not a bad guy." He said, he didn't know why Sanghyuk was talking about Hongbin like that.

"Yes, he is Hyung! Taekwoon Hyung already explained everything to me." Sanghyuk countered.

So, that's what Taekwoon said to him? Another lie again?

"But, don't hate him Sanghyukkie. He just loves you." He tried to change Sanghyuk's mind. He don't want Sanghyuk to hate Hongbin because it will just hurt Hongbin more.

"You're really like Taekwoon hyung, hyung. That's what also he told me! Taekwoon hyung is too good right, hyung?" Sanghyuk said dreamily now forgetting his anger towards Hongbin.

"Ahm... Yes? Ah-- yeah, Taekwoon is so good. He's perfect." Hakyeon said, full of adoration. Taekwoon is indeed perfect for him, despite all of this.

"Hyung, he's mine." Sanghyuk said with a playful grin.

"I know Hyukkie, I know..." He can't never be mine, he thought.

He was about to say something when the door suddenly opens.

"Hyukkie! You'll be discharged later!" Taekwoon said happily, walking towards Sanghyuk's hospital bed.

"Really? Yes! Then, we can go back to Korea now hyung!?" Sanghyuk also said in the same excitement as Taekwoon, Sanghyuk then hugged Taewkoon when the older reached the other side of the bed.

"Yes, anything you want." Taekwoon replied, leaning his head on Sanghyuk's messy hair.

Hakyeon was left at the other side of the bed. Looking Taekwoon hugging Sanghyuk lovingly. It hurts a lot. A very lot. How he wished that he's the one who Taekwoon loves. In that case, there will be no lying. No one will be hurt, and everything will be fine. But it's not. Taekwoon loves Sanghyuk not him. Hakyeon loves Taekwoon, but the other can't love him back.

Hakyeon smiled sadly at the sight. Somehow, watching Taekwoon being so happy in Sanghyuk's side made him more happy than being sad. After all, his main priority is Taekwoon's happiness.

Call him martyr but he thought that maybe helping Taekwoon with this will make Taekwoon love him back someday. Hakyeon can wait for how long, whenever that someday will be.

"That's good to hear, I will now call Jaewhan and Wonshik or Hongbin about the news." Hakyeon decided to excuse himself, but it's like he's talking to the air because both Sanghyuk and Taekwoon were too engrossed with each others presence.

\-------

"What did you do to him hyung?" Hongbin shouted and that caused Jaewhan to stir awake.

"Hongbin? What are you doing here?" Jaewhan asked sleepily when he was awakened by Hongbin's shout.

"Hyung? What happened to you? Did Wonshik hyung did this!?" Hongbin said with a mixture of worry and anger when he grabbed Jaewhan's bandaged hand slowly, afraid to hurt the injured hand more.

"No, I just cut myself accidentally Hongbin~ah no need to worry. What are you doing here?" Jaewhan said again, now fully awake.

Did Wonshik called him to tell everything? Did Wonshik lied to him!?

Jaehwan turned his gaze at Wonshik. Wonshik was sitting at the floor, near the foot of the bed. Face looks really miserable.

"You sure hyung?" Hongbin asked again, still not believing Jaewhan's words.

"Yes. Now answer my question." Jaewhan said, he's getting pissed.

"Wonshik called me earlier, saying to get in here ASAP because he needs to tell me something important." Hongbin replied, eyes still gazing at Jaewhan's hands worriedly.

"Really? Hhmmm, what could it be?" Jaewhan said, trying to make his voice to sound like his also curious.

"Yeah Hyung, what do you need to say that you sounded so serious?" Hongbin now turned his attention on the silent Wonshik on the floor. "Wait! Did you two fight?" Hongbin added.

"No." Jaehwan answered hurriedly.

"Yes." Wonshik replied, now lifting his tear stained face.

"Okay, which one should I believe?" Hongbin asked, confused. Did they really fight?

"No, don't listen to him Hongbin. I swear, we didn't fight. You know Wonshik, he can joke sometimes. You know, he's hanging out with Hyukkie lately so maybe he just want to prank you." Jaewhan explained.

His having this feeling that Wonshik really wants to tell Hongbin the truth. This made him super mad again. Wonshik lied to him. Wonshik was still on Hongbin's side after all.

"Is that true hyung?" Hongbin asked Wonshik.

Even though that Jaewhan already explained to him, he still wants Wonshik's confirmation. Because as what he heard from Wonshik earlier on the phone call, it seems like it's not a prank or a joke. It's really a serious matter, Wonshik won't joke something like that.

Wonshik remained silent. He's now debating on what to reply, to tell the truth so that he can help his bestfriend who was really hurt for this situation? Or, to lie to Hongbin to save his relationship with Jaewhan because he knows that Jaewhan will try to kill himself again if that happened. He's really confused right now. He doesn't know what to choose. He can't figure out, who's more important for him.

"Hyung?" Hongbin asked again after a few minutes of not getting an answer.

"Hongbin, don't mind him." Jaewhan said, trying to stop all of this.

"No hyung, I want to hear from Wonshik hyung." Hongbin said sternly.

"I'm sorry Jaewhan~ah, but Hongbin the truth is that al--" Wonshik was cut off by Jaewhan's shout.

"STTTOOOPPP!!!!" Jaewhan shouted.

"Hyung! Let Wonshik Hyung finish!!!" Hongbin said to Jaewhan angrily. He badly wants to know what would Wonsik say that makes Jaewhan act like that and also that caused his bestfriend's state like this.

"It's that, all of this was just a lie." Wonshik finally said.

"Wonshik! You're really a liar!" Jaehwan shouted, he was about to lash Wonshik but luckily Hongbin was able to stop him by holding Jaewhan's injured hands hardly causing the older to wince in pain.

"What lie hyung?" Hongbin asked confusedly.

"Hongbin~ah, you're hurting Jaehwan." Wonshik instead said.

"No, I won't let go of his hands if you won't explain further to me." Hongbin said, his now angry with all of this. What lie!? What does that mean?

"Okay, about the current condi--" Wonshik's words was cut off by Hongbin's ringing phone.

Hongbin badly wants to let Wonshik finish but it was Hakyeon who called and thinking that maybe the older called to tell something about Sanghyuk, he instead let go of Jaewhan's hand and take the call.

"We'll talk after I'm done with this." He said, then he stepped out of the room to talk to Hakyeon.

 

 


	17. Han Sanghyuk

Han Sanghyuk was such an innocent guy. He grew up not being alone, always with his mom and dad who guides him. There's no one who was always on his side beside his parents. And he's very contented just to have that.

When his mom and dad left him on the daycare center with some strangers, it was the time that he realized that he can have others to be friend that who will always be with him and that was his hyungs.

Out of all of his five hyungs, he's very close to Hongbin maybe because they didn't have a lot of age gap. Starting the day that he met his hyungs, they were always together. Grade School, Middle School and now College.

Talking about Hakyeon, he was the one who always act as a mother for them. He treats them like a baby most especially to Sanghyuk. Sometimes he was annoyed by Hakyeon's nagging but at the end of the day, he was very thankful to have a hyung like him.

Taekwoon was the coldest of them all, but despite his coldness, he turns into a soft and caring person when it comes to Sanghyuk. And that's the reason that besides Hongbin, Taekwoon was next to his closest.

The cutest and cheerful of them all was Jaewhan. Jaewhan was really a good guy minus his child-like behaviour. His way of showing his love is a lot like Hakyeon but not including the nagging. But Sanghyuk wondered as to why that when they reach their second year in middle school, Jaewhan somehow becomes too attach and clingy to Hakyeon. It seems like, every Hakyeon wanted, he'll do it without complaint.

Wonshik was the cool guy of the group. He likes to sleep more but he's very protective. He easily get possessive when someone tries to befriend his friends. He acts as their guard that protects everyone's safety.

Lastly, Hongbin. Hongbin holds a very special part on Sanghyuk's heart. Sanghyuk didn't mind it at first but as they grew older, he somehow realized that he love his hyung. Sanghyuk suffered for almost a year of hiding his love for his hyung. Then luckily, one day Hongbin confessed to him and Sanghyuk was the happiest man at that time.

They were already dating for a week when they decided to tell one of their friends about their relationship. And Taekwoon was the first one to know about it. Sanghyuk was very eager to tell his hyung that they are now dating because Taekwoon was the only one who knows his feelings for Hongbin when they were still not dating. After telling Taekwoon, Wonshik was next. Sanghyuk was a bit disappointed because Wonshik's reaction looks more happy than Taekwoon's. He decided to ask his hyung about that but Taekwoon only said that he was a little sad because his Baby Hyogie was now a man.

After the two finds their relationship, they also tell about it to the remaining two. Jaewhan's reaction mirrored to Wonshik and Hakyeon was like Taekwoon. But he just shrugged it of because maybe Taekwoon and Hakyeon has the same reason.

Their relationship went smoothly. But he will be lying of he would say that they didn't have fights. Yes, they have. And every time they fight, Sanghyuk always seek comfort to Taekwoon in which the older will always help him.

Almost two years of being in a relationship with Hongbin was the happiest. But things started to change when they were nearing on their second anniversary. They now fight a lot. They fight over little things.

One of it's reason was the guy Gongchan, Sanghyuk always feel jealous every time Hongbin and that guy were together. Sanghyuk can clearly see on the guy's body laguage and eyes that he has feelings for his boyfriend.

One night, they were fighting again. This fight, results in Hongbin walking out on their shared apartment and just come back home at morning.

"You're saying me that your teacher paired you with him?" Sanghyuk asked, trying to hide his anger.

"Yes, you have any problems with it?" Hongbin replied.

"Yes I do have! It's Gongchan! How many times I've told you that to stay away from that guy!?" Sanghyuk shouted, why Hongbin can't understand him?

"What's wrong with him? He's a good guy!" Hongbin also shouted, now angry.

"I don't like him, I hate him. It's just the same on how you feel on Sungjae. And now you wont follow me when I follow you when you said that I should stay away from Sungjae!?" Sanghyuk was now ranging in anger.

"Gongchan and Sungjae is different Sanghyuk. You know, I'm tired with you getting jealous over him when supposedly you should not feel that way because Gongchan is only my friend." Hongbin said then walked away.

Sanghyuk just waited Hongbin on their living room, not letting sleep take over him. And when Hongbin come home, Sanghyuk can sense that something bad happened.

Hongbin just hugged Sanghyuk tighter and just keep on uttering the words I'm sorry, I love you, I didn't mean it and Please forgive me. When Sanghyuk asked why, Hongbin won't tell him. He'll just say that sorry for making him wait and walking out on him even their argument was not yet done.

After that day, Hongbin became distant to him. Hongbin always denied his kisses or other loving affections. Before, Hongbin was the one to initiate, but now it was Sanghyuk and worse Hongbin always denied saying that he was tired from school.

It broke Sanghyuk's heart, everyday all he felt was being lonely and alone on their apartment because Hongbin will just focused on his homeworks, Sanghyuk will immediately call Taekwoon and let the older fix him and make him smile. Makes him feel wanted. Taekwoon will always comfort him and Sanghyuk really appreciate that.

When they went to Wonshik and Jaewhan's shared apartment one day, Wonshik asked them if they were okay. Maybe Wonshik sensed that they were very awkward to each other. Sanghyuk, choose not to answer his question, he just went inside the house to have a chit chat to Jaewhan to somehow clear his mind and make him forget about their fading relationship with Hongbin.

It was about two hours have passed, when they heard Wonshik shouting. Jaewhan immediately run upstairs to check what happened. Sanghyuk didn't mind on following because he didn't want to see Hongbin's face.

About ten minutes have passed, Sanghyuk grew impatient because Jaewhan still hasn't returned so he decided to see what was happening to them upstairs. And then he heard that Hongbin was somewhat crying. Jaewhan and Wonshik was asking something from Hongbin and the latter wouldn't tell anything.

Sensing that this conversation was about on what happened on that night, Sanghyuk also asked Hongbin stating that he was eager to know what happened because he already know that something was off since that day. But instead of getting a reply, Sanghyuk was dragged harshly out of the house by Hongbin. Hongbin gripped hardly on his wrist that whatever force Sanghyuk used just to make Hongbin let go, the other wouldn't budge and Sanghyuk guessed that his wrist will bruise later.

Hongbin pushed him beside the drivers seat of and then speeds of the car with Hongbin driving. During the whole car ride, Sanghyuk was shouting. Demanding an answer from Hongbin. When Sanghyuk was tired of shouting, he just cried and cried while letting his thoughts be heard by Hongbin. He let it all go, all of it, on how hurt he is on what Hongbin was acting for the past few days.

"You don't how it felt when someone you love doesn't look at you the way he looked at you before. You don't how it felt when he become distant to you. You don't know how it felt when he turned down your hugs and kisses. It hurts so much when he'll just prefer to study than be with you. It hurts so much when you feel that he no longer loves you and what hurts the most is that I don't know why he became like that. You don't know how much it hurts because I didn't do it to you." Sanghyuk cried.

After letting it all, Hongbin finally admitted the truth that caused Sanghyuk to get wild again. It hurts so much, he can't believe that Hongbin did that to him. Because of anger, he told Hongbin that they should break up but he was scared and torn out on what Hongbin did to him.

What Hongbin did caused the accident.

 

 


End file.
